So much size impresses the ex, even irritates him. Plus, he or she doesn’t need to feel guilty or feel sorry for you. So the ex will much rather come into friendly contact with you again later. From there, it will be much easier for you to get back into his or her closeness and relationship.
In order for all of this to work out, we have to start with your thoughts. Because only if you actually don’t care a bit what your ex does, you have a relaxed and cool charisma that your ex will buy from you.
You have surely seen a pair of scales before. When is this scale balanced between you and your ex? There is a new partner on the ex’s side. And who is with you … Exactly!
The scales are not balanced. You have no one by your side. This makes you weak and less interesting than your ex. I recommend from my own experience: You too now need a replacement relationship, someone by your side. In coaching I always illustrate this by holding my two hands up in the air, left and right, like a scale: Your partner is on the left with his new relationship. On the right you are alone. Are the scales balanced? Where is more weight, more going on, more attractiveness?
Your ex with a new partner weighs much heavier. So you need someone too. So very often we give effective start-up help in finding someone attractive who is now by your side, despite lovesickness and sagging self-confidence. Because that’s easier said than done. Often you stand in your own way here.
If you manage to break the loop of lovesickness and become more relaxed and also have someone, no matter how superficial or serious that is, you are just as positioned as your ex.
If you then still work on yourself in my sense, i. H. you turn up on sports, personal development (as we always do with our coachees), then you develop further while your ex distracts himself with the rebound partner. It’s like your ex is driving down the street with his / her new partner while you stealthily drive past them on a hidden back road for the next few months.
Maybe you have a mutual group of friends with your ex or you work together or have children together. This may lead to situations in which you encounter the newcomer and have to deal with him / her in some way.