The Americans are known to be superficial, especially with new acquaintances. My experience confirms this. Personally, I prefer my conversation partner to be honest (without killing the conversation itself – should be clear) than someone who looks interested, but actually he doesn’t really care what I’m telling him. In my opinion, that has a lot to do with honesty – for that I appreciate the – in general – the (mainland) European culture.
I have little experience with the British, although these are somewhere between the extremes of A **** crawling (sorry for the expression, but that’s exactly how it always seems to me) of the Americans and the type of “Germans” … whereby The British understand better how to skilfully change the subject if they don’t like the current topic of conversation – which, in turn, I really appreciate.
In general, the Scandinavians are my favorite, they are very reserved, but very friendly and also honest when you ask them about it. You are not pressured, but you can almost always start an interesting conversation.
And one more point at the end, which pissed me off when reading through the various statements: The Germans often seem angry about who and how they are … You should see the good thing in our narrow-mindedness: of course, we are a little colder , but we can do something for it and can afford it (e.g. in business). And if it really bothers so many … why doesn’t anyone change anything? Everyone just complains … THAT is typically German for me;).
Funny, just the day before yesterday (I went dancing alone) a guy said to me: “First I noticed your legs, then your bosom”.
In my question, in any case, I assumed a first date, so in my opinion a (still) relatively superficial “tapping” of the other person.
I don’t know what you are talking about in the first long conversation, but I am very surprised when all conversations go so deep that you can make concrete statements about values such as “honesty”.
Especially since the so-called honesty in my example is more of (unnecessarily !!!) confrontational behavior in the wrong place.
You can also be unlucky and maybe your buddies are not the big talents.
But I think there is still a difference between a superficial, nice expression and sensitive politeness. Maybe it’s just diplomacy.
And there are definitely enough Germans who are fed up with the bad mood in their own country and who take action against it!
I work in a company where people are very “German” in terms of mood.